I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3 I want The Sims 3

I want it.

But it's 50$ & I am broke.

Wah, that makes me sad. =[ <---see, look at that pathetic little unhappy face! You cannot deny my pain!

I really don't want to make someone get it for me, because it is rather expensive . . . thought on a few occasions my resolve has broken and I've asked my parents if they'd be able to purchase the little game of wonder for me.

I'm a terrible person, asking my parents to spend their hard earned money in such a wasteful way.

A computer game. Who really needs them? I have a roof over my head and a few meals daily. How dare I ask for such a petty, non-essential item?

Because I want to make Castiel and Dean Woo Hoo and have pretty angel babies!

I do! I do! I do!

This is rather tame compared to the way I droned on and on about The Sims 2 before it came out. Aliens, Dad, Aliens! And the guys can get pregnant! Pregnancy! Before they'd just make out and a baby would pop up out of nowhere. Did I mention the kids have homework now? And you can edit their features, and there's genetics! Genetics, I say!

Gah, I pity whoever had the misfortune of running into me back in 2004.

But did you hear that the town is seamless?

I kid, I kid not really - it looks so cool!

It's 9AM and I cannot sleep. Nope. Not at all. Not one bit. Nada.

( zzZzZzzzZ )

( don't make me smite you )</div>

I haven't gone to sleep yet, so in my deranged little head it still counts as Saturday. Suck on that, calender-thingy on my computer!

So here are a few highlights of my day:

• I did not study, at all. Nope. Not today. I have a final on Monday and another on Tuesday, but . . .
• I got my sewing machine to work! I have to take a picture of the pretty lady soon. I'm naming her Cassie. Had nothing to do with Cas. Nope. I think not . . . STOP STARING AT ME! It took me a few hours to figure her out, but I'm quite sure we shall make beautiful interesting things together. I started screwing around with a too-big spider-man tee I loved but didn't wear because of the ill-fittedness of the thing. I made it a bit too small (haha) but plan to fit it with some spider-man fabric I saw earlier. It shall be, something.
• My head hearts from lack of sleep.
• VAL MADE THE MOST EPIC CAS/DEAN VIDEO EVER AND i MUST SHARE!

I miss Melanie.

My whore is gone and I do not know where she is hidden.

( ze random shit )

College starts tomorrow & I'm kind of in denial about it.

I haven't gotten a damn thing ready, but I did spend the whole day trying to finish a Nuke fic.

Time well spent, I say.

I don't know. Last semester wasn't too terrible, but I did have this little class called Quile. Quile was an intro to College course. Which pretty much can be summed up to show up and get a A . . . or B, if all you actually do is show up.

I got used to my month off.

If was an awesome month off. But as mentioned, I never really hated class. Sure, there were times I'd stay up until two or three in the morning finishing work, but that was mostly because I waited until 10pm to do anything. I don't know if my classes this semester will be any worse. Last year my concentration was Educ. Pre-escolar, which they had a bit of a focus on [we have to be better than the other schools! woo!]. This year I changed to Phych. I don't know if things will be easier or not. They had a really big focus on Spanish because, as a teacher, I had to be able to express myself properly to the young ones. Now I don't. Less demanding class this time around? I have no clue. But that class wasn't very demanding. I learned and all & we did most of the work in class. The profesor wasn't some nutjob demanding essay upon essay [which I was very happy with, because translating to Spanish suuuuucks]. So now, yeah . . . No clue what to expect. It probably wont be too terrible, since I don't have anyone to hang out with I can spend some time on actual school work.

Yay me being an antisocial dork!

The idea of going to college is still kind of weird. Probably because there aren't any cute guys.

Oh well, hope tomorrow doesn't suck.

I started imagining how I think my life will be in the future. Not what kind of job I'll have, or how much money I'll be making, because honestly, we all know both shall be crap. That's life. I for one cannot wait!

I won't be won't of those charismatic people who everyone migrates towards. I'm the dork who thinks it's funny to yell, "I'm sorry, just don't hit be, please!" in a store when my friend asks for something. I like TV way too much and obsess over movies. Way. Too. Much.  I watch a soap opera because it has a cute gay couple and tend to slash together the guys of every fandom I'm apart of. I'm loud and I'm sarcastic and I'm insecure. I'm also very picky with people. Y'know, because I'm so darn amazing.

Seriously, I am.

So, yeah, it'll be a miracle if I have more than one friend in the future =]

I'm going to have three cats. I'll probably name them after a cute actors or the characters they play. One is going to be named Padackles. The last one, I'm noe so sure about. It's between Noah, Luke or Jake. I'm leaning towards Jake . . . or Noah . . . . or Luke . . . exactly. Then we have Sammy, who shall be their leader. He's a bad-ass cat; he's part demon.

See? Complete loser!

I'm going to be that girl who spends all her time at a bookstore, sitting in a corner and staring at some cute guy who isn't interested. Then I'll go home and play the sims 4 or 5 or whichever is out by then & talk to my cats. I'll read fanfiction all night and then go to whatever crappy ass job I've secured myself. & you know what? I might actually be happy. It's kind of sad, but I'm kind of looking forward to it.

I'm wondering if it's a little weird how a little story can make me so happy. With a smile and this feeling of being content and pleased and other happy words I can italicize (<<< and holy shit, that's totally a word. i kind of thought i made it up. anyway!) . And I just want to be dragged into some fictional world because they're always better than my day to day life because fanfics  have Jared and Jensen, that so rules over everything else. Gosh, I really do love reading. Well, I love to read smoopy, angst filled fan fiction that always has a happy ending and might make me cry.

sigh

I love stories.

It's weird.

( scrubs season 8 ftw )

I'm a paranoid person. I have anxiety problems. Nothing that requires medication I think, but it's still annoying as fuck.

Every time I enter an elevator I imagine it either dropping down or staying stuck with me trapped inside. God forbid you get me on an airplane, because I'll have a fucking panic attack. Anytime I'm any building that has more than one floor I picture myself falling off the edge and breaking something, or, if it's high enough, dying. I can see the blood leaking into the pavement. I'm used to it, though, this constant fear of death. But still. I have to say . . .

SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH THE 2012 CRAP.

I can't even be outside alone at night without picturing rotting corpses walking towards me.

My brain is fucked up alone as it is. I don't need to hear about how I'm going to die in four years.

So, fuck you, History Channel for having a damn Apocalypse week. Your Seven Deadly Sins messed with me enough. Yeah, I'm going to hell. Yeah, I have 4 years before eternal hellfire. Thank you.

The only thing that makes me feel slightly better is that I'm finding many things I've seen in Supernatural. When they discussed the sin of Pride, I flashed to the black eyed guy in a suit saying, "Here's Johnny!"

Oh, well, if Dean and Sam can't save us all, then we're just fucked. I least I get Winchester eye candy down under =]

And I feel stupid for thinking, "But I don't want Jensen and Jared to die, or Van and Jake. No more As The World Turns? I mean, sure, I'll get to go down knowing Sam and Dean's fate, but what if they decide to keep on filming? WHAT ABOUT JENSEN AND JARED'S FUTURE PROJECTS?!"

Yes, it's a lot easier to deal with the thought of death if you just concentrate on missing your favorite TV shows.

And again, I say: Fuck you, History Channel.

I'm sleepy and hungry.

I'm sitting on this comfy chair with wheels at work.

Yes, I work.

If you you can actually call what I do technical work.

I've seen to have fallen into a specific pattern here - I arrive at two PM sharp (give or take ten to fifteen minutes), say hello to the lady in charge or my daily tasks, do whatever simple procedure of delivering papers or photocopying shit that has been asked of me, and then spend the rest of the two and a half hours I have left either standing in the hall like an idiot, or sneaking on to the computer and feeling like a really bad worker-person.

I went on Amazon and Ebay, looking for accessories for my [soon to be] uber-awesome Dorothy costume for the upcoming halloween.

I'm choosing to ignore the fact that I currently have absolutely no plans for that night.

Whatever, I wanna dress up and I want free effin' candy.

Why is it that whenever I have homework to complete time slips past me before I even notice it was there? But no, here the seconds inch their way by in this very evil kind of way, and I'm getting a backache.

I still have an hour to kill.

I'm hungry.

I'm considering reading some slash, but then I might go to hell - and then get fired. I really want my paycheck, so I guess that's a no.

Would they notice if I took a nap?

Oh gosh, I am so destined for failure. I can't even keep myself effin' entertained - I keep on having fantasies about the candy bars in the vending machine downstairs.

Not eating breakfast and deciding to not bring money for lunch is not a smart decision on my part.

Oh, aren't there supposed to be a bunch of uber nice looking guys at college? I'm not saying I plan to get asked out by one, but the eye candy would be nice. Throw me a Jensen over here! College life really kind of isn't awesome.

=[

I want food.

and supernatural.

and to be able to leave.

So I'm sitting here, watching the first episode of Supernatural. I just saw In the Beginning again, because I kind of happened to miss the first ten minutes, and trust me - I felt like the worse fan in the history of forever.

 

 

( I love Dean )

 

I'm such a damn procrastinator.

I have homework and that's not cool.

Instead of doing any of it I'm downloading Drake Bell songs.

Don't ask.

One reason I tend to not pay too much attention to politics outside of The Daily Show: those people frustrate me to no end.

I do not understand how grown, educated adults fail to own the ability to debate with one another in a respectful way.

Seriously, it makes my heard hurt.

So, Obama used the phrase "it's like putting lipstick on a pig," and apparently he's insulting all women kind.

I watched two females debate whether or not this is a true offense, or if it's just something completely idiotic. I think one of them was named Mary Smith, and I think I hate her. What about the actual important topics out there [which I am more than willing to say I have no clue about]?I really don't give a damn whether or not the pitbull with no experience may or may not have been insulted kind-of-maybe-on-purporse.

I don't like people.

They're stupid.

I'd like to learn more about this whole polical junk, but I'm afraid I might go insane.

Tokyo Hotel is freaken adorable.

Russell Brand rawks my socks.

I just noticed that it's September first.

For a second my brain had no idea what importance this specific date holds. I was looking for the event that ties the feeling of hey, this means something! down in my head. Then I looked up at my Harry Potter books.

Happy first day of school, Hogwarts students!

Yeah, I'm a huge freaken dork, I know.

And now I'm kind of envious of fictional people who get to go to an insanely awesome fictional place.

If James, Sirius and Remus are there, I want to go.

So I read other people's journals, and I can't help to notice that in comparison I happen to sound like the biggest-little brainwashed fanwhore in existence, who doesn't happen to be twelve.

Granted, it's something I've always had in the back of my head, and I've gone over there and greeted it and invited it over for gummy bears and Dr. Pepper, because being completely honest, I don't give a fuck. I don't view having a negative opinion on something as being being knowledgeable on it, and it sure as heck doesn't make you right. Seriously people, all these little things we write stories about and obsess over and sing to until someone tells us to shut up, they don't have a right or wrong. I don't understand how some people don't understand that their opinion isn't in fact, a fact. But still, we bitch over how something sucks, and is terrible, and how whoever created it should be killed. Oh Lord, forbid that someone else actually enjoys it, because they can just go and suck cock. We're past the stages of simply saying, "I don't like it." No, it's sucks. It's bad. Screw you and what you think; I don't value your opinion but I expect you to agree with mine.

Granted, this is usually just the shit that goes down on the internet, but it's where I usually reside so I'm going to complain a bit.

So yeah, that's a big reason I don't share my negative views. Because, yeah, it's only what I think and what the heck do I know? I like music, but I haven't listened to enough of it or studied it at all long enough to know if one thing or another is an insult to life as we know it. I've learned to not over-analyze things that ought not be thought over past a certain extent. I take things for what they are, unless it's a new Harry Potter movie because I can bitch about those things for weeks.

I just don't see a point in arguing over something when it's plain knowledge that theres not a single amount of words or passion for the subject that will change anyone's mind when they're set on something. But maybe I should practice it, all the jobs I'm interested in require the ability to tolerate people's bashing and start a bit of drama on my own.